- Take advantage of the months where your baby can’t move.
- Baby weight is hard to lose when you love cake
- It’s okay to have a messy house
- Bath bombs are overrated
- Becoming a mother has helped me to chill out (weirdly)
- I’ll never be as skinny as I was on my wedding day
- Instagram is a HIGHLIGHT REEL
- Not everyone is going to like you (but they don’t need to actually tell you they don’t like you because that’s RUDE!
- Going back to work wasn’t actually that bad
- Now I have a child my food will never be my own again
- Maternity leave can be lonely AF
- Toddlers + Christmas trees = hell
- Swim nappies can not replace normal nappies. Piss everywhere.
- RIP pelvic floor
- Not having to fill in my brows is a GAME CHANGER
- I’m a die hard Jezza Corbyn fan
- No one is winging motherhood we’re actually all trying really f*****g hard
- Evie hates Father Christmas
- People on Instagram can be more supportive than people you know in real life
- Your 1 year old will not give a crap about opening presents and would rather sit in a cardboard box
- Hangovers + parenting = disaster
- Husbands won’t understand why Emma Bridgewater mugs are £20
- Time moves at the speed of light when you have children
- Everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about
- You don’t have to share everything on social media in order to be ‘real’. Part of your life can be public and part of it can be private.
- Everyone’s kids have tantrums
- Brexit is shit
- I’m a bit of a grandma who loves early nights and pyjamas over a night out
- Buying clothes for your child is an addiction
- I spend too much time on my phone
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